The OFFICIAL STORY

One day, Aaron and Matt arrive before a Spelljammer session at my house. They seemed to be in on some kind of joke, but claimed they were sworn to secrecy and under NO CIRCUMSTANCES would I *ever* find out what happened. They then continued to act strangely. After a few attempts to get it out of them, I said “Ok, fine. I don’t need to know what happened. From here on out, the OFFICIAL STORY will be that Aaron got drunk last night and got nailed in the ass by another guy. I’ll be sure to let everyone know what happened when they arrive.” Well, it didn’t take more than a minute for the real story to come out,  along with a declaration that I was a “complete bastard.”

The real story was much less colorful, involving someone we knew getting drunk and making an ass out of themselves. From then on, THE OFFICIAL STORY became a term for a grossly exaggerated or completely fictional account of what happened in any circumstance,in the absence of other explanations or evidence. Many times since, when people go missing or can’t be reached by phone, an OFFICIAL STORY is concocted, such as “The OFFICIAL STORY is that Matt was eaten by werewolves, unless he proves otherwise.”

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